of Playgrounds, Cartoons and Hospitals

Ever since i could remember, i was a sick child. Not psychiatrically but physically. There were regular trips to hospitals, doctors, sinsehs. I had asthma, tonsilitis, sinus and the flu regularly. When i was younger about 4, my asthma was pretty bad. So much so that i had attacks about once in every 2 months. And it just so happened that it was always at night in my memory. I remember with startling clarity sitting there on the couch outside the doctor's office, trying to be brave and not cry(but i always cry in the end), waiting to have a go at his wonderful machine(the one which will help me breathe normally). Everytime i had an asthma attack and went to Thomsom Medical Centre, they'd give me this transparent medicine that tasted very sweet, this was one of my favourite medicines. The other one was the yellowish one for vitamins Dr Jaleha always gave me. I hated the red yucky one they'd give for a dry cough and loved the brown benedryl they'd give for a wet(phlegm heavy cough). Can you imagine? I child thinking about medicine like they were sweets... I remember the horrible powder water from the chinese sinseh, which didnt do any good. I can taste that horrid medicine till today. I wasnt really allowed to run around much, not much sweet stuff either, or soft/cold drinks. I think these all explain my dislike for sports, soft drinks(esp gasy ones) and great love for anything sweet.

I was admitted to the hospital when i was 6 in hongkong due to a severe asthma attack upon arrival. It wasnt that i didnt go there before that, i knew i did, but i guess it was too cold for me at that time to take during winter. I recall sleeping on the hospital bed at night, looking around the greenish room. My mom was sleeping on an armchair and my uncle on a sofa, but my dad wasnt there, said he had business in singapore, couldnt come. I remember the nurse telling me i was brave because i didnt cry or so much as squeak when she poked a huge needle into my right hand. i think it was more likely that i was afraid to move in case it hurt any more than it did.

There wasnt anything i was afraid more than pain. I'm not particularly spooked by the dark, ghost stories or horror shows for long, only a little at times. But when i was a kid, a little nick or cut would be a bid deal. I remember once when i was a little older, about p4 or 5 i guess. i was running around my grandma's temple with my cousins and i tripped and fell onto my knee. I screamed and said i think i broke it, my grandma, me being her favourite grand daughter, believed me and almost got the ambulance to really send me to the hospital. i think i got over my fright and told her there was no need. Then i was back to running again. There was also this great fear that my asthma would return someday, in pri 4, i had a flu so bad, i couldnt breathe properly, i was so terrified that i was getting asthma again, i had to see doctor jaleha(my childhood family doctor) immediately.

I loved going to the playground downstairs because i couldnt really go due to my health problems, but i'd go once in a while to play. Anyway, i guess one of the reasons i didnt go down as often was cos i had my own playground in my grandma's temple(not a playground set, but rather a playing-ground cos the place was simply so big for a little girl). I recall i couldnt really swing, cos i didnt know how. One day, i met this spunky little girl who claimed she was the same age me and saw me around all the time but i had never seen her before. She dared me to swing higher than her and when i told her i didnt really know how, she offered to teach me. I think it was a tie that day. Then through the years, i thought she was the RGS girl who walked like a robot and didnt say anything. But i didnt put much weight into that belief cos i simply couldnt believe that spunky girl was this quiet girl.

Since i wasnt really allowed to run around much, i was usually sitting at home watching cartoons. I remember watching whatever they would show on channel 5 those days, like sesame street, he-man and his sexy gf or sister or whatever(now showing on cartoon network), ninja turtles..among others. Through those days in front of the television, i developed a great love for cartoons, and a need for glasses in pri 3(although i only started wearing them in pri 4). To this day, i still like to watch cartoons. Just think of it this way, everything i do, every single day requires me to work my brain. Whether it be reading the newspapers, surfing the internet, blogging, studying. Cartoons are a kind of brainless entertainment that is easy to enjoy. I dont think la bi xiao xing wiggling his ass at you requires very much brainwork for you to laugh at it. Too bad ben cant find the cds.

My grandma would force me to drink all kinds of soups, we cantonese believe in the power of soup. I drank, among the expensive, birds nest soup( i always only drank the water), ginseng chicken soup. Among the wierd, lizard soup, crocodile meat soup, sometimes soup with this wormy looking herb thing which i know in cantonese but not in chinese.

My childhood, summed up in 3 words, playgrounds, cartoons and hospitals. Now in my near-adult life, i look back at my childhood, with a certain nostalgia. It was such a carefree time. I am grateful that i had people who loved and cared for me so much.